Saturday, September 20, 2014

Tantrum

Today I'm annoyed.

I've been taking propranolol for migraines for a couple of months now, and it isn't doing a GREAT job. Since I've been charting my headaches this month, I'm still getting them about half of the time. Not as bad as I would if I wasn't taking it, but still there. So I got a new medicine, naratriptan, to take when I get one, plus two days prior to menses for seven days. That means that in fifteen days, I have taken nine, and now I'm all out because they only give you nine. I can't get a refill because insurance only lets you get nine per month. The pharmacist was chatting my ear off about it all and how they want to take care of me and do their best blah blah...but I was getting a headache...and I'm sick of it and don't want to listen to the nice things people have to say, I don't want to listen to ANYTHING.

I just want to crack open my skull and take out the pain.

Head pain makes people grumpy, impatient, annoyed with everything. The light, the sound, the thing you're wearing, what you're talking about, having to exist, medications running out at different times, it all seems so unmanageable, even impossible. It feels like big, cumbersome concrete puzzle pieces that a team of 30 people are dragging around trying to fit, trying to see the puzzle, but they can't and there's too much noise and everyone is confused.

No comments: