Friday, May 20, 2005

I promise it's worth, really!

So, things have been hard. Really, really hard. I don't really have the energy to rehash everything, but let's just say that during the last year we have watched Mina's bright, happy, friendly and energetic personality deteriorate. It happened slowly, which makes it tricky to notice, but anyway... anyway... All of our energy over the last month has been spent on dealing with this. ALL of it. Reading, talking, searching, thinking... several weeks ago, Mina went gluten free/casein free, and ever since then, every day it's like my Mina is back more and more. She is bright, smiling,'s like she was put under a spell and is coming back to life now. I can't believe it. I say that all the time and it's true, I just can't believe it.

Mina is sick this week with a cold/cough. We also had a doctor appointment on Monday to let the pediatritian know what's happening and we had a ton of bloodwork done. We had to go back on Wednesday because the Thyroid test came back a little low, but it's fine. The doctor has faith in the diet, which is really good to hear. It wouldn't have made a difference, but it's good to hear that a doctor is acknowledging that diet might have anything to do with anything.

This morning Mina was a bit crabby because of the cough and runny nose, but she ate her eggs like a good girl and so did Leta. Leta eats anything. After breakfast Jana called to say she was going to stop by this park near my house with Kal, so we decided to throw some clothes on and go over there. When we go to parks I feel so overprotective. I see other kids Mina's age climbing around and going on slides and their parents are doing their own thing. I am constantly making sure Mina isn't walking off a ledge or going down a slide face first, even though she is so cautious I doubt she would do any of those things. I am trying to back off a bit.

We came home and ate chicken soup and coconut macaroons for lunch, and since it was so nice, we went to the zoo. On the way to the zoo I was thinking about how cool it is to have stuff to do with the kids that doesn't cost anything. Do you know how many great parks there are here? Parks, bookstores, downtown, Willy St., various kid friendly coffee shops, the the summer there are always people outside playing music everywhere you turn.

Mina was so happy to see the bears. She correctly identified a polar bear and a black bear! She is fascinated with birds and loved the ostrich, geese, and flamingo... The sea lions were being very silly and making her giggle. It was a great trip. Leta was even into it!

On the way home from the zoo my day peaked when I had a moment of absolute clarity. The kids were passing out in the back seat and I was listening to a really great mix cd that was obviously put together with great care by a really great friend. A Rachael Sage song was playing. I thought to myself, you know, look at this day. Look at these trees. Look at these cherubs in my back seat. I love my life. It's pretty good. Sometimes, even a lot of time, it's hard, but things come together. They come together, break apart, come together, break that moment, suddenly, I felt I understood, the universe, everything, nothing, it's all the same, and it's beautiful. And no, I haven't been eating anything funny. Suddenly, I wasn't afraid. I felt like a part of it all, and in that sense, at ease. Not worried, just happy.

It's funny how these things often happen while I'm driving.


Jen said...

This is good to hear. :) I'm glad things are looking better.

Anonymous said...

Well, I am certainly pleased to hear that. Now can I come visit again. Can we do it over???? Except for the late Friday night part. I won't make you go through that again !!!!! No Mud in the hotel either....
I love all my pictures and look at the kids everyday and wish I was closer...

Hilary said...

sure, GG, you can come up again, who says you have to ever leave???

yer mom said...

My Life is so lovely with you in it!